As I anxiously await
In a dark candle-lit room
For a tall dark stranger
Who promised me tonight
I feel wild and mysterious
As I am no longer myself
But a daring labile woman
With an overwhelming power to excite

No longer am I trapped
In those tight bonds of marriage
I feel the freedom engulf me
And I tremble
Now the grieving and emptiness
Is in the past: I am content
Free from all the pain and torture
I grow emotional

No more broken promises
And no more lonely nights
I know where you lie tonight
And I really do not care
Because I sent you straight to hell
With a bullet in your head
They believe it was suicide
Never to know I killed you dead

(approx.. age 15)
by Bonny - ©1990 to present
Author's Note: This particular poem as well as several others were written during my youth and while they are not entirely a reflection of how my life actually was, they sum up a tremendous amount of feelings and emotions felt at that time. For me, being bi-polar, I had a colorful array of thoughts and expressions that you will find in my writings. As an adult now, I find my writings to be an interesting link to my past and a reminder of how far I have traveled to become the person I am today.